4 years ago

It is the middle of the night and I cannot sleep. I fell asleep after reading Hadley a story and a few minutes ago just caused a flutter because I tried to make Hadley go to the bathroom. That scene woke up the whole house. She didn't go before bed and so when that happens she tends to kick her legs in the middle of the night, a sign she has to go. Well she cried the whole time and no pee, so back to bed she went. Now I am worried, I know she is fine, but I worry she could end up with a bladder infection. (shaking my head now!)

Anyway... 4 years ago right now I was google searching the terms, "amniotic fluid." My water broke around this time, well started to leak. I remember getting up and going to the bathroom, then having wet pants that kept getting wet even though I got up to change. I knew it must have been my water because the same type of thing happened to Shanessa. But, I google searched it just in case. I was trying to prepare myself for what was about to happen, however there is nothing that can prepare you for the birth of your first child. I didn't tell Robert right away, I left him sleeping and dreaming. Those were his last hours of childless sleep.

After my research, I knew it was indeed my water, so I went back to lay in bed for a little bit to relax and again prepare myself for the unknown. I laid there thinking about the items in my hospital bag, I took a couple deep breaths and thoughts rolled through my head like, "it will be fine or I am sure this isn't it or don't worry." I was nervous, I am not going to lie. I had no idea what to expect and the thought of it scared me to death.

Finally after an hour passed maybe a little longer since my initial wake up I nudged Robert. I told him this was it and we should go to the hospital. I didn't have any contractions but I didn't want to wait it out at home either. I wanted to confirm my findings, at least find out about the leak so if it wasn't my water, I could try to go back to bed. We got ready to go, jumped in the car and drove over to Onamia. The roads were empty and the the air was cold. It had snowed and the whole ground was freshly covered. Around 2:30 a.m. we arrived at the ER doors and the only moving anything was a snowplow. We pushed the button and Robert responded, "we think my wife's water broke." The door opened and we were greeted. I was given a robe and I remember thinking, "really a robe, you don't even know if I will be staying." But it was time, the baby was 9 days overdue.

I changed and I was able to rest in bed, they tested the water and it was amniotic fluid. So much to my denial, it was going to happen. I don't want to bore you with the rest of the details because I am sure I have written about them before... but my heavy contractions started around 9 a.m., I tried the usual but it didn't really help. The epidural was late because of surgery, so I didn't get any relief until around 3ish. I pushed from 5:30 to 7:30 and finally was in c-section around 8:30 and Hadley was born at 8:55 p.m. It was a very long day. But it was worth it!

Dear Hadley:
4 years ago today you decided it was time to come into the world and make Robert and I parents. We are so blessed each and every day with your gracefulness. My heart as well as your Daddy's is overflowing with love for you. You are tender and sometimes timid. You are brave and strong. You are a learner and a doer. You enjoy reading and playing. You love to pretend. You are open minded and have a mind that loves to tell stories. You are an amazingly patient big sister. You are our Hadley and we couldn't imagine this wide World without you. We know you give it your all in everything you do so we look forward to watching you grow. We love you to the moon and back!